Monday, December 31, 2012

Adios, 2012!

Oh, 2012.

You were a year off contradictions. You saw me at my highest and my lowest. You saw lots of smiles, laughs, tears, and cries. You saw memories I'll never forget and days I hope to forget. I never expected all that you held, but I survived and I'm ready to look ahead.

You brought me a baby. Our son. Quite possibly our last child. And that will make you linger forever in our lives. You'll be written down on every form that asks for his birthday. And long after the bad memories fade, like they always do, you'll always be the year I became a Mommy of two. June 9, 2012 was a precious day.

You brought me a new home. Oh, how I hated our rental house, where we spent 11 months. I feel like a brat complaining, but I've done a lot of it. It was never really home. I went into labor there, brought my baby home there, and tucked my sweet toddler in there every night. But I longed for something else. December 1, 2012 will be remembered as the day I smiled when I pulled into our driveway. I have hopes for this new home. I smile more here already.

You brought me trials and hardship. I don't know if it was PPD, but I was sad a lot. I cried a lot. And I put up a brave face. I never expected it, but it consumed some of my days in 2012. I knew I was lucky and blessed and had much to smile about, but I cried. Sometimes I cried a lot. I loved my kids and my husband deeply, but I had hurdles I didn't even understand. I was tired. And overwhelmed. And desperate to be completely happy. I'm getting there. 2013 holds more happiness and memories for our little family.

You brought new friends. And caused me to lose others. You taught me a greater reliance on God and on family.

You brought way too much weight gain with pregnancy and not near enough weight loss after pregnancy. 2013 will be the year I see myself as pretty again.

You were a hard year. A wonderful year. An emotional year. A complicated year. Thanks for the memories, because I know that I'll remember the good times we had, which although often overlooked, were plenty.

2013, here we go.

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